May 15, 2007. A date which has haunted me for some time now. After one inning of play Twins pitcher Ramon Ortiz was trailing the major league team from Cleveland to be renamed later 6 - 2 yet i remained optimistic that Ron Gardenhire wouldnt attempt to manage the game by prematurely spilling out of the dugout & going to the bullpen. After all Ortiz was our only multi-million dollar offseason acquisition and more importantly the Twins were 1 inning into game 1 of a 9 day 9 game road trip. Lets not panic i thought, surely our manager comprehends simple fractions like 1/81 but Gardy's calculator only adds up to 8008 and he summoned the bullpen. No one handles big league pitching like Ron Gardenhire - see 2002 postseason,  Rick Reed over Kyle Lohse and Johan Santana - see 2003 postseason, Anyone over Kenny Rogers - but i calmed down by rationalizing that once the move was made the last pitcher to make the roster would be handed the ball to take one for the team throwing at least 80 pitches regardless of the outcome & when the Twins trailed 9 - 2 after 2 innings (hey gardy if your solar powered calculator is still functioning that would be 2/81 of the way through the road trip) i fell asleep content that our franchise could once again overcome our manager. I woke up to yet another nightmare. The morning box score showed the score had gone to 15 - 3 and Gardenhire's scorched earth policy layed waste(as only he can) to Ortiz, Perkins, Guerrier, Crain (yes Crain brought into a 9 - 2 game), Rincon (brought into a 15-3 game), and Reyes. I felt disoriented but if Santana is pitching tonight he's good for 7 innings (just 7 because Gardy is frightened of a bizzaro world where starters go 8 or 9) therefore the damage done to our bullpen wouldnt seem so traumatic. I searched the sports section for information - morning sickness set in - Carlos Silva was scheduled to start and Jesse Crain was scheduled for a M.R.I. his shoulder squandered holding a mop. Crain's season is over but for The People of Minnesota vs. Ron Gardenhire the trial has just begun. May God see us through it.